It could be because the demographics in my profession as an educator are predominantly female, but nevertheless, I thank God that I’ve had so many female bosses in my life. I’ve had some great male bosses too, but just as a child needs to see herself in a story as a mirror to her own identity, it is critical for a woman to be around other women who lead in order to become a leader herself. Being guided and mentored by strong yet unashamedly sensitive women has helped me to really own my womanhood and view the feminine qualities inherent in me as some of my greatest strengths. Some of the most inspiring women leaders I’ve come across in my life have instilled in me three types of effective leadership: supportive leadership, servant leadership, and symbiotic (cooperative) leadership. 

Supportive Leadership 

My former boss, Kathryn, mentored me and invested in me in order to help me achieve my personal career goals apart from her own—even when our goals conflicted. Supporting her employees was her leadership style. I noticed when I worked with Kathryn that it was not uncommon for her to have lunch with former employees or for them to surprise her by stopping by to say, “hi.” She built relationships that engendered lasting mutual respect and endured after the work relationship ended. She showed me the importance of valuing the people you work with, and I experienced this from her first hand. She created an environment that allowed me to safely share my career goals although they did not include continuing to work for her. Once she knew about my goals, she created opportunities to allow me to build the skills I would need, she helped prepare me for interviews, and she went out of her way to recommend me highly for the position I desired. She mentored me wholeheartedly. As a result, I declined various opportunities to leave and chose to continue to work with her longer than I had initially intended because I felt so valued and supported by her. When your employees don’t love their position but stay because they love working for you and visit you even after they’ve moved on, that’s good leadership.

Servant Leadership 

My son attended a preschool for almost two years before I realized the office assistant/teacher’s aide was actually the owner of the school. Other preschools have owners who lock themselves in an office all day or are absentee owners with someone else running the school. Ms. Toni, however, purposed to spend half the day in the classroom as a teacher’s aide to the Pre-K class to stay connected with parents, students, and her staff. By being willing to wear a different hat for half the day, Ms. Toni instilled confidence in her teachers. She acknowledged their experience and let them be the leader in the classroom. Her practical service to her employees helped build relationships with her staff and also made herself available to the families that sent their kids there. As a parent, I felt incredibly warm and fuzzy about my son’s Pre-K days knowing that he was spending the morning making salsa with the owner of the school from the things she helped him grow in the school’s garden. I felt that the rest of the staff working in his classroom was probably giving 110% because their boss chose to be in the room helping kids go potty and cleaning up after snack time for half the day. To me, that’s serious leadership.

Symbiotic Leadership 

My current bosses are three women who work together as equals to run a homeschool co-op. They have been doing this for over 15 years! The fact that their program has endured without anyone trying to usurp one another is a testament to their leadership abilities. There are no divas; theirs is a culture of mutual respect and trust. There is no hierarchy; they recognize each other’s strengths and heed the wisdom of one another. As situations arise, they determine which of the three of them is best equipped to handle that particular conflict and delegate according to their talents. When necessary, they partner up and support each other both publicly and privately. They give unwavering support to the teachers in their program and care deeply about each of the families who participate. They are encouraging, discerning, and empathetic. They work to bring harmony to any and all circumstances. Now, that’s leadership. 

Great leaders are supportive of their staff, servants to their employees and clients, and cooperative with others in symbiosis. I’m so thankful that I’ve had so many women in my life to learn these lessons from and look to as examples of who I want to be as a leader. What lessons have you learned from wise women in your life? In what ways can you be a supportive, servant-hearted, symbiotic leader where you are today?